Wednesday, November 16, 2005

ZaZa Lazar - An Exclusive Interview With Rock's Most Famous Canine Roadie (11/16/05)


How many dogs can claim to have met Bob Dylan, Paul McCartney, U2, the Rolling Stones, Bruce Springsteen and about a dozen other music legends? For French Bulldog ZaZa Lazar, it's just part of her rock `n' roll jet-setter lifestyle. Thanks to my mid-90s stint working for the Rolling Stones, I was recently granted special access to ZaZa to learn more about her adventures. Our conversation led to the following piece, which recently appeared in the Fall 2005 Edition of the Chicagoland Tails Pet Magazine.

Tails: It sounds like you're living a pretty exciting life!
ZaZa:
I'm a very lucky Bulldog. I have a great mom.

Tails: Who is your mom?
ZaZa:
My mom is Shelley Lazar, VIP ticket director to the stars. She's been in the concert busines since Woodstock and I don't mean that Woodstock on MTV with the explosions. I mean the Woodstock.

Tails: May I ask how old you are now?
ZaZa:
I'm 26 months old, but people say I don't look a day over 6 months.

Tails: What's a typical day like for you?
ZaZa:
When we're at home in San Francisco, a normal day is to wake up, do some stretching, take a morning piddle and a poop,
head to the office, do lots of ball throwing and catching, play with my squeaky toys, and hang out for an hour with Jab (my walker). Afterwards, we head back to the office for some rest, then head home for an evening romp in the park and to watch some "Law and Order" and "CSI".


Tails: What about when you're on the road?
ZaZa:
If it's a travel day, I stay in my fancy carry-on bag with the Tiffany & Co. luggage tag attached. I always travel by plane. I don't do the bus thing. I only stay at first-class hotels and definitely enjoy those accommodations. I especially love the down comforters and soft pillows. On a show day, I head over to the empty arena for sound check. I always like sound check because it's like having my own private concert without people spilling beer on my head.

Tails: Do you hang out backstage?

ZaZa:
Sure. After sound check, I go backstage.

Tails: What's that like?

ZaZa:
It's great fun. Backstage you get to meet movie stars like Jack Nicholson and you get to be fed by the backstage caterer. I can't say no to broiled chicken and a good piece of filet mignon!

Tails: We've all heard crazy rock `n' roll stories before, but have you ever had to do anything questionable to get backstage?
ZaZa:
I thought we agreed not to discuss that.

Tails: The people want to know, ZaZa.
ZaZa:
Well, I have actually been known to offer "favors" in order to get backstage. That's all I'm going to say.

Tails: Does a lot of partying go on backstage?

ZaZa:
I can't tell you too much because no one would let me back there if I start gossiping. But I am clean and sober. I have always been and always will be. Well, I do have the occasional sip of wine, but that's it.

Tails: Anything else you'd like to divulge?

ZaZa:
Again, I don't like to talk about such things. I abide by my signed, licked, and delivered confidentiality agreements. I'm always willing to pose for the many paparazzi who seem to follow me around, but I can only tell so much to reporters.

Tails: Do you have any rock `n' roll doggy friends?
ZaZa:
My best friend is my cousin, Ruby Tuesday. Ruby is a Maltese whose mom is Jane Rose, the manager of Keith Richards from the Rolling Stones.

Tails: I'll bet that dog can party!

ZaZa:
Ha, you reporters don't give up. Ruby is a cool cat. We love listening to music together.

Tails: Do you have a favorite song?

ZaZa:
It depends on my mood. When I want to rock out, I listen to the Stones, and Bruce Springsteen's "Born To Run" really gets me going. When I'm in a mellow mood, James Taylor's "You've Got A Friend" calms my soul.

Tails: What about "Who Let The Dogs Out?"

ZaZa:
Ugh, that's so cliche. If I feel like dancing, I listen to Donna Summers' "Hot Stuff".

Tails: Do you have any special talents?

ZaZa:
I'm very talented. I've learned a lot from Mick Jagger, like how to strut. I also have perfected my tongue-hanging Gene Simmons impression. And I do a little acting, too - for instance, to get extra attention, I pretend I'm Bono. You know, lots of attitude.

Tails: Have you influenced the set lists at my shows?

ZaZa:
Well, Frenchies like me are known for being quite flatulent. Some people on the road have suggested that Dylan has played "Blowin in the Wind" in my honor.

Tails: What do you think of Snoop Dogg?
ZaZa:
I have some issues with him. Mainly because he's not a real dog. I really think it's time for him to be honest with everyone and just admit it.

Tails: What about Trimph the Insult Comic Dog? Have you ever met him?

ZaZa:
I'm sure his breath stinks from all those cigars he smokes.

Tails: What exciting things do you have coming up?

ZaZa:
I have a tour with the Stones and another with Paul McCartney. Love to chat more...but my limo's waiting.

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